Diversity – What does it really mean?

What exactly are we talking about when we say diversity?  Diversity of thought, culture, choice, color or all of the above?  I believe it covers all of the above and more!  Our corporate culture has been going through massive changes the last 20 years.  Now that we are moving towards a global economy, global culture, what is best for you on your work team?   America is best known for its melting pot of cultures in our people.  We are proud to come from all over the world.  In a global economy this is the perfect solution for our companies to hire people from different cultures.    Wouldn’t we all be bored if there was only one kind of potato chip, or better yet, only one kind of clothing we could all wear?   Yes, I am making a point to diversity.  Diversity, variety, differences change everything….   For the better.

Do you have a diverse set of solutions to consider for issues that come up in your work day?  How do you get a diverse set of solutions even if you decided you needed them?  Would you need several different viewpoints of the issue to resolving it?  Often, the best solutions come to the top and people are put in a position to combine the best with the best.

Picture it – imagine if the best ideas of the Republicans worked together with the best ideas of the Democrats.  That would be a great scene! In order to do this there is one very important element;  to get the “best” solution everyone must have the same common goal:  Business 101, Marriage 101.

15 years ago the corporate workplace was dominated by more of an exclusive environment even with the feminist movement and integration of all cultures in this country, especially at the top.  That has changed in recent years, but mostly because the companies were forced to take a hard look at the numbers and meet the lawful requirements of considering diverse candidates and a diverse workforce.  These companies are busy “complying” and making sure that they are ready for that next audit that may come their way.  It is actually working!  Some companies are going so far to market themselves as diverse and that can be true.  The marketing of diversity has taken off among the corporations.  Most if not all of the high profile companies have a full marketing plan to showcase how important it is to them to have a diverse population at their workplace.    But you know what they say, “The proof is in the pudding is in the tasting!”

The truth is a company can have a great marketing plan and advertising campaign to attract culturally diverse candidates, but what really counts are the actions that are taken within the company to interview and hire diverse candidates and give them a good career opportunity there.  Does your company take a more active approach?  Taking an active approach means interviewing culturally diverse candidates for every job as a general guideline.  This creates wonderful synergy for the hiring manager.  I have seen both sides of the coin.  First a high profile company (to remain nameless) who proclaims to have a diverse work force, and support the hiring, and has the awards to show for it.  But they don’t support this initiative internally.  The hiring managers are not encouraged to interview diverse candidates, and go with the flow of change. Executives are still mostly male white men.  On the other hand, I am working within a high profile company that insists the hiring managers interview diverse candidates for most of the requisitions.  This creates an immediate synergy for the hiring managers for change.  Managers need employees that can succeed and so when they must interview diverse candidates, it supports that change when they realize they can hire highly successful, diverse employees that bring value to the table.  Pretty soon those employees turn to manager level, and up the ranks they go.  Now that is truly a diverse moving workforce.  Resistance is futile, diversity is part of the culture for the hiring manager unless that person wants to move onto another company.  It should not be another façade of doing things “right” in the corporate workplace all the way up the ladder.

Well is it true?  Does a diverse workplace make a difference in cutting edge technology, innovation, processes, and help companies to become a world class leader in the global market place today?

What is Yoga to you?  To me, Yoga is an ancient tradition, a movement that is not only based on Physical alignment of your body but also based on energy movement in the ancient tradition of the “Sutras” or in other words, psychology of a good life lived, or sought after, or a philosophy on life.  Why you say?  Well the physicality of yoga is connected to the spirituality or energy of your physical makeup.

In an incredibly simplified version, the physical movements of yoga are supposed to help us move towards the attainment of who we really are, the person behind the person.  It strips away the layers of our ego, like peeling an onion.  Simply, the subtle effects that yoga can have on you can change the way you react to life.   Although not immediately apparent, when you walk out of a great yoga class, you should somehow feel lighter and clear headed.  We do this through aligning the body physically in a particular sequenced order so that energy can move through the body, and out, so that new revitalizing energy can move in.  The addition of breath work with the physical movements supports this process and is essential to a good practice.

Stress is moved out of the body, and new energy will revitalize how we feel.   My belief is that Yoga, in ancient times, was a daily routine, like drinking coffee, as it evolved as the benefits of this movement were recognized early on.

I do not believe Yoga is a substitute for a good cardio work out; in fact I feel that it supports it.   A yoga class is not meant to strain you; in fact just the opposite.  It brings you right before your edge and teaches you that the more movement you do, the more flexible you are in ways that you never understood.  And yes, this then becomes a metaphor for your mind.    The sequencing is so incredibly important to this practice which is why I prefer a Yoga studio over a health club.  Finding a good yoga studio is like finding a great therapist.

In yoga, we have the opportunity to shut down the outside world, and focus internally.  The internal chatting becomes lowered, which allows you to be with your body, and breath.  When the attention is focused on caring for the movements of my body, it then in turn cares for you.

I became hooked on my first true yoga teacher in the 90’s and my love for the sport did not dim.  At times, it can relieve stress better than a good massage.  It clears my head and my direction.  But we all go through phases and for me there are times that yoga is much more important to my routine then others.  It is my hope that I am able to maintain my yoga routine throughout my life, as it brings me a level of peace to my life that helps me to enjoy life to the fullest.

What is the activity that helps you to focus inward, and supports you in your day to day stress?

Educated people, great careers, working so hard to make the American Dream.  They work, and have children… they seem to have it all.   It is about being happy and many want to look good. In our more wealthy areas, folks are more concerned about “keepin’ up with the Jones’.”  But alas, nothing is ever as it seems these days, and an epidemic has taken over our neighborhoods…   over scheduling, and partying with our children to relax.  Is this self-absorption the cost to looking good and having it all?  Our neighborhood friends can’t even manage life sober when they are home.  And they can’t think straight to get a sitter when they are not.

We strive for many things in success, to have healthy and happy lives and educated people and to constantly strive for better in ourselves and others. I see parents struggle, with schedules, with work, and with balancing sports, birthday parties, and family events. Instead of scaling down the activities, getting rest on the weekend, these families feel it is their duty to keep up with all the activities that are in their schedule.   It is no longer a matter of the needs of the children and taking care of their physical and mental health and prioritizing.  The focus is keeping up, and maintaining at all.  Red Bull, constant coffee to get going or stay up at night, or during the day, and when the kids get cranky because their too tired, stick them in front of the TV, drag them through the store, have them attend a soccer game, or dinner, or even better, bring them to a neighbor’s house so that you, the parent can drown your sorrows in a beer or a glass of wine, or better yet, a joint.

Prechoolers out until midnight, or for that matter grammar school child out until midnight or later watching their parents play.  Is this the result of the 80’s “me” generation, still wanting the world to revolve around them?  Or is it the product of the stress this economy has caused?   I believe it is both and the fact that many of the “grown-ups” today have not learned to cope with the ups and downs of the changes in their lives, their families, and their day to day career.   Raised in families similar, they have not made the strides to overcome the challenges of parenthood and the responsibilities that come with that.  Women will not insist on healthy flex schedules, and men insist on keeping more traditional roles in many instances.

Who will this hurt you say?  Well, it hurts the parent because you ignore your physical needs, compromise your optimal functioning and get sick easier.  It hurts marriages because there is minimal alone time for the couples.  It hurts the family unit because there is no time to be together without rushing, doing.  But also it portrays the image an uneducated person, and for many reveals itself an image of a broken family that drinks to keep it together.  Your children are exposed to much more at a younger age, which has its pros until they are exposed to drugs at a much younger age, and sex at a much younger age and many activities that are not age appropriate.  And if you are not paying attention at these social gatherings, what you don’t realize is that your children are drinking and doing drugs as soon as they can figure out how to participate.  This can create new issues like drug and alcohol problems, behavior problems, pregnancy, and issues with focusing on school for children.    OK – Deep, yes!  But not always the results.  I am not saying your children are destined to have these problems but their risk of having issues goes up dramatically.

So this is a very thought provoking issue when it comes to asking you what you want for your children as they become adults.  How can we solve this issue in our community?  How would you take a stand?

I encourage you to delve deeper – Here is some information to get you started:

http://parentleadership.com/signs.html

http://www.hyper-parenting.com/sioux.htm

The time is now to enjoy, for You to enjoy and move into the life you are meant to live.  Yes, You should read into this. Time and time again, I see women who are ready for babies, and believe it is their responsibility to be married before they bring a child into this world.  They must find a suitable mate, and marry him, and start the baby making process, in that order, and for some it only to ends up in divorce.  But in recent years a new trend has started.  Educated, fully employed women have been having babies, just out of wedlock. Why you say?  Because they are educated and smart women who are not going to get married Now and/or do not feel the obligation to be married.  So this brings us back to our Now.  It is our responsibility to enjoy every moment. Don’t let anything hold you back to your own happiness.  Granted we all need to think about the responsibility it takes to be a parent, the time, the love to share, and the money.  If you are ready to walk into parenthood in a responsible and mature way, you are much further ahead than many of the folks that are married and having children.

There are many ways to go about this.  Artificial insemination,  or a boyfriend, it doesn’t matter.  If you are approaching it in a responsible way and raising a child that will be a productive, informed adult someday, as far as I am concerned, you are much further evolved than most of the young folks today.    I noticed this is a trend, and it may be a much healthier way to have babies then to get married.  Many women get married these days so that they can have babies, and a reason like that is a recipe for divorce.  When children grow up in a culture they have already known since birth, it precipitates a healthy emotional life.   All of our culture in households is different, even in our married families, and so children should grow up just as healthy if bringing a child into this world is approached in a mature manner.   There is definitely a benefit to have 2 parents at home, even if there is no marriage.   We all know that.  Fathers can be involved when they are aware and approve of children coming into this world, even as much as married fathers, and if they don’t live there, it is not a recipe for a bad upbringing, just adjustments in lifestyles.  Role models in that child’s life are just as important as the mother and father figure.    Remember the saying, “It takes a village…”

You don’t have to look far to see what an issue this is.  Pregnancy happens out of wedlock “by mistake” and then all of the sudden there is a wedding in the making.  This behavior is typically associated with the poor, the people who don’t know any better.

I say that the educated  people who have money do have the resources to bring a child into this life without being married.  And for them it could be a better choice for their children then to step into a marriage that will go sour and raise children.  Let’s face it, it is so important to have children for most people, and so they are now realizing that they can overlook the social norms of marriage and still enjoy parenthood.     This can create a more healthy and happy life in my opinion for those parents that would otherwise be unhappy in their marriage.

Would you have a child out of wedlock if you were not married to the spouse of your dreams?

Screamers

To live with a screamer is an experience unto itself.  At times, I wonder who this creature is screaming in my house, such a far cry from her kind, loving way of being.  To listen can be the most difficult thing to bear which warrants removal of me or her from the room.  I give myself timeouts so that I can sit in quiet for a moment and gather my thoughts before making my next strategic move to calm the little monster down (I say that in a loving way).  Her recent reason for screaming was she was quite tired which facilitated an ordered bath; it did the trick for her.  Sometimes, a conversation works, but one thing remains the same.  I do not allow the drama to continue, otherwise she is reinforced and it just gets worse.   So all I can say is if you have a screamer, you are not alone.  And for those who don’t, count your blessings. 

For those children who have been screamers since birth and recently are at a peak, I feel your pain.    No they do not scream all of the time, but even a couple times a week makes life a little more difficult.  When they were younger, it would help to say, “Use Your Words,” and now, they  Scream their words… It has been a habit that is hard to change and walks along side the whining. 

I recently purchased a sign for my house that says “No Whining Allowed ……  Ever”.  I was hoping it would assist me in laying down the law.  This was my experiment to see if I could tone down the whining and screaming.   So far, I have received several responses on the chalk board next to it, saying, Boo Hoo, No Way, Not Fair, but I continue to point to the sign when I hear the Whining, which often can turn into screaming when I say No!  It is too soon to see if there is a difference yet. 

There are so many reasons behind screaming, guilt, fatigue, boredom, and often for no good reason, but then sometimes, they scream because they need to sort something important out and do not understand how to communicate it.  This is what makes it hard for us parents to discriminate.  I believe the answer is in discussing with your child after he/she has calmed down.  Very often they are very straight forward and will say to you, “I don’t want to go to school because…”  Please take them at their word and support them in facing the issue and finding a healthy solution.  Obviously, there is something there that he/she is struggling with that you can support he/she on.   Oh Yeah, and for those of you who hear the screaming coming from my house, you should know I hear your children screaming too!

“What’s Up Down There?” No for real! So much does go on down there and things are constantly changing due to our hormonal cycles. It is confusing as it is, but then throw in pregnancy, and then… post pregnancy… and before you know it, menopause. Yes our schooling and sometimes our parents told us how the machinery works earlier in life but they did not explain the nuances in the body, the natural rhythms that create our own original experience and the fact that we all have similar issues. This becomes clear although we all have our own unique privates parts with their own needs.
Then there is the “orgasm.” I learned that a large percentage of women don’t have one! What about you ?
Well, I am here to let you know that whatever you experience, you are not alone, and Lissa Rankin is there to let you in on the secret in her book, What’s Up Down there? I love how she gets into sexuality, and orgasms, and even sex in your 80’s in this book. I laughed out loud so many times reading about her experiences with her patients.
But more importantly this book shared information that I was unwilling to discuss with friends (and I can say a lot!), information that helps you to understand your body better, information that lets you know you know you are normal.
The message she conveys is get to know your body, love your body and enjoy your sexuality. So if I had to review this book, I would say this is a must read for all women. It is one of the current books of our generation for our sexuality. So go , get to know thyself better! As Lissa would say, “Let’s talk about coochies and boobs.” Read it and let me know if you got anything out of it

Barbara Salvador has been recruiting for 20 years both in child care and corporate career industries, and is a parent of 2 beautiful girls. She truly understands the search for the right nanny is a journey – from the perspective of recruiting to the very personal decision of who will become part of your growing family. Check out her website at www.nannymama.com

Great Blog about where we are going with the babies and small cell devices  ….

I have a very good friend who is a nanny. Almost every time I see her, her iPhone is either scratched or has a broken screen because she lets the children she cares for play with it. It’s really no surprise. As we know from this study…

via Slobber Alert: Turn Your iPhone Into A Baby Toy.

“Before I fell pregnant I started to think about all of the women that I know who have struggled with conception. I am interested in superstition and how to instill my seemingly innate luckiness into an object that I could distribute to others. I wanted to create a symbol that embodied the essence of fertility. I began to paint this symbol with Japanese ink on Sumi paper. Then I fell pregnant…”

Conception is a 60 ft scroll of japanese rice paper that has been painted in a meditative state with a recurring symbol of fertility. This symbol has been distilled from various cultural/historical symbols of fertility such as the Venus of Willendorf, the circle (of life) and the celtic spiral. The sculptural form is itself a spiral and will be sectioned and distributed as lucky talismans to people who wish to conceive at the conclusion of the show. 
Tara de la Garza
www.taradelagarza.com

Conception is a 60 ft scroll of japanese rice paper that has been painted in a meditative state with a recurring symbol of fertility. This symbol has been distilled from various cultural/historical symbols of fertility such as the Venus of Willendorf, the circle (of life) and the celtic spiral. The sculptural form is itself a spiral and will be sectioned and distributed as lucky talismans to people who wish to conceive at the conclusion of the show. 
Tara de la Garza
www.taradelagarza.com
RIPE: conception and perception
Anonda Bell and Tara de la Garza
Opening reception Oct 23rd 7-10pm
Closing reception Dec 11th 7-10pm
Gallery Aferro
73 Market st, Newark, NJ

This whole Health Care Debate has me in a tizzy.  The question becomes even when we have health care for all, are we looking at the fine print,  and more importantly, what is the real issue here.  Much of this issue is the state of our health in the nation.  Juvenile diabetes is up, Up, UP!!  Why you say,… well just take a walk into one of your weekly birthday celebrations.    It is not enough for the children to run around and have little piece of cake.  But now they must be provided with soda, juice, and goody bags full of sweets.  No parent would ever deny a child more soda if they are thirsty, especially if it would make them look bad to other parents (do you know what is in a can of soda?)… and you know, these kids get thirsty.  I guess water is hardly an option anymore unless the child specifically asks for it.  Even at family celebrations, it is only polite to be serving cake, ice cream, and pastries for dessert.  Dessert is taken to the next level and the snacks on the shelf in the grocery store qualify for the same category as desserts when I grew up.  Parents profess to be aware, but when it comes to this celebration and that celebration we give in… it seems like every day!!  I do not claim to be perfect… far from it.    All I am saying is there is a lot of talk among parents agreeing on this but when it comes to focusing on your own children and family, it is hard to adjust.   That is when the health of our children gets worse, and worse. 

Get Informed -

Google It:

http://www.state.nj.us/health/fhs/shapingnj/partners.shtml

http://www.whale.to/v/sugar_q.html

http://www.facebook.com/SmartHabitsFans#!/SmartHabitsFans?v=wall

Get Cerebral:

http://www.techjackal.net/other/2010/04/22/sugar-is-not-so-sweet-for-your-health/

http://www.nature.com/oby/journal/v10/n6/full/oby200266a.html

http://www.reuters.com/article/idUSTRE63J69U20100420

http://www.princeton.edu/pr/news/02/q2/0620-hoebel.htm

http://www.nydailynews.com/lifestyle/health/2008/12/12/2008-12-12_sugar_as_addictive_as_cocaine_heroin_stu.html

The Heart of the Matter- Community Participation makes such a difference to your Town!  There is so many great things about supporting local farms.  Many local Farmers in NJ use much less pesticides!  WE are hoping to get an organic farmer for both vegetables, and for meats this year in Caldwell….

http://caldwells.thejerseytomatopress.com/detail/3308.html